Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Feria after the Epiphany, 2011

Yes, so, let me tell you the three little miracles that happened this day, as promised from two posts ago.

1. Got to St. Augustine's before Mass. Confessions were being heard. I was next in line and a young man was after me.

The person before me left, the lights went off, and Father stepped out of the confessional. I went to take a seat, and I think I prayed half-heartedly, because I was disconcerted that God did not want me.

The young man who was behind me came up to me while I was praying and said that Father will hear our confessions.

I think Father was waiting in the door jam and proceeded to go back in. I gave him some time and went in. And thanked him.

I made my confession , he absolved me, and asked me to send in the young man who was after me.

MIRACLE ONE: God made Himself availible to me via this Sacrament. Father was done (I think he thought there were no more penitants), but, he saw that there was still time and people needed to repent.

Then, later, time for Holy Communion. I was thinking about how, either on that Sunday or The Feast of the Circumcision, I had the opportunity to kneel on the marble step directly, not on a cusioned kneeler.

I waited.

THIS Friday, 1/7/11, God gave me a second chance and presented the humiliation to me again. I gratefully took it in Thanksgiving this time. :D :D :D :D :D

MIRACLE TWO: I had the opportunity, undeservedly, to commit and show God my love and adoration for Him. :D

After Mass, though, undeservedly, I was graced GRACED with TWO miracles, I just, couldn't really get my heart in prayer of Thanksgiving. I just couldn't....really commit to talking to God. I couldn't focus or really....feel like I was saying anything relevant.

After a while, Father was walking down the aisle to leave the church and I don't remember if he spoke first or if I did (probably he did) but, he knew I wanted to speak with him. He said that he could talk to other parishoners if I wanted to pray more. I told him I always want to pray more. (which is true, in front of the Blessed Sacrament, I do. I mean, how does one turn one's back on God? How does one say, 'Okay, enough for now, catch You later'?) "What's that?" he asked me, and I repeated myself. He said he would talk to other parishoners and just to come out when I was done.

Needless to say, I was exuberent in my prayer to God after that.

MIRACLE THREE: I'm not even sure. That I had the opportunity to speak with Father? THat I had a renewal in inspiration and adoration?

I do know, however, that I was very ungrateful, for some....stupid reason, before that third one, THOUGH I HAD NO RIGHT TO BE! WHY?!!! When God had ben so providing and outgoing to me twice before?!!!!!

I finished and went out to Father, and, well, you can read the other post for that, but, this night, three miracles in 90 minutes, two of them taking less than 30 seconds has helped me in the past few weeks.

God used Father to show His love for me.

...I just don't even know what to make of that.

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